S1 E27: I Hate Everything

In this episode Genie tweets for anyone wishing they were a snowbird. Solange’s new album and Marvel’s Luke Cage drop on the same weekend, and guess how Genie feels about it. . .

Show Transcript
Happy Monday, Black Twitter!

I hope it’s a happy Monday for you. I’m not crazy about it, but I’m tryna be optimistic.

Bills paid? Check
Roof over our heads? Check
Clothes on our back? Check

Then, let’s get it.

Today, I’m gonna tweet for people who vowed never to spend another winter in the northeast, yet here we are. . . here we are.

Every time we start having cold weather I start wondering how I made it through the previous winter. My life goes from being real rosy, to feeling like I’m a Charles Dickens character, freezing in an orphanage, begging for more porridge.

You know it’s bad when you want more pasty porridge.
That porridge looked like it was made from the newspaper scraps and Elmer’s glue.
Like it could’ve been used for papier-mâché.
Do you think they even put sugar in it?
Would that have made it better or worse?

Either way, I’m still trapped in the world of Charles Dickens until the temperature gets back above 75 degrees Fahrenheit. Send help . . . and then fly me south until May. PLEASE.

Anyhoo. If you’ve been following Good Morning Black Twitter on Twitter, or watching the show, you know that I’ve been on the lookout for a short story writer, for something special I’m planning.

WEYOLL!

I’ve found a great writer, and I want to thank everyone who answered the call and sent me their writing samples. The response was great, and there are some really good writers in Black Twitterville. Shout out to y’all.

Now, if I haven’t mentioned it, Halloween is my favorite holiday –

Outside of holidays you get the day off of work for just to eat all day –

So, to celebrate, I’m planning a special Halloween episode of Good Morning Black Twitter.

Will it be a trick?
Will it be a treat?

You’ll just have to tune in and find out, now won’t you? Good Morning Black Twitter’s Halloween special will be released on October 31.

Okay, so. . . down to business, are you or are you not a Solange truther?
If you’re wondering what a Solange truther is. . . so am I.

But, I think maybe Solange truthers think that people are lying about liking Solange’s new album.
If I got that right, tell me what I won, Johnny.

Have you listened to Solange’s new album? It’s called A Seat at the Table. I was listening to it on my commute last week, and I gotta say. . .

I got Nathan.

Don’t get me wrong, Solange’s vocals are sublime.
But, nothing about her songs moved me, or felt particularly memorable.
It was all very easy to listen to. . . but, also very easy to tune out.
And, I mean. . . thanks for the black lives matter message. . . but it also kinda feels like people are going up for anything activisty and black, lately. . . it’s like how people would applaud the person performing at the Apollo just for singing the Jesus song.
If we’re honest, their performance isn’t that great, but they’re singing about Jesus, so we’re all obligated to clap. . .

[single golf clap]

And, lately, that’s how it feels when anything “unapologetically black” comes out. Like. . . even if it’s just okay, people are gonna go WAY UP for it, because it’s the Jesus song at the Apollo.

And, in all fairness to Solange, this genre of music just isn’t my genre. I also don’t listen to Jhene Aiko, and I don’t listen to whoever else is in that genre. I couldn’t even tell you who else has recorded music for that genre.

The closest I get to liking that kind of vibe is Sade. And, Sade’s music has way more happening than the music I associate with whatever we call the genre that Solange and Jhene Aiko are in.

Speaking of unapologetically black things I didn’t see it for this weekend. . . Luke Cage dropped. And, again, people went up like birthday balloons. And, I was made of questions. . .

First of all, when is this show even happening? Is it 1976 Harlem, or 2016 Harlem?
Can we pick one?
Why is Luke such a prude he can’t date the mama he sees in the shop every week, but the next scene he can pick up a woman in a bar?
Why did the meddlesome old man think it was a good idea to get between a mobster and his money?
Why is “nigga” a plot point in the show?
Why is Jadakiss as hard as it gets?

Wait. Sorry. Back to Luke Cage.

My biggest issue with the show is the inconsistency, and just . . . I really don’t understand anyone’s motivation. It’s melodramatic, and overreacts. . . and, takes me out of enjoying the story.

Like, can you imagine meeting someone for a first date, and right out the bat they tell you you’re the one they want to marry. . . It’s like, whoa! Wait a minute! We just met. Can I at least learn something about you? What kinda girl do you think I am!

That’s how I felt watching Luke Cage. Like. . . they wanted me to cry about the death of a certain character. . . but it was only the second date, bruh. . . let’s wait a while.

Also, I really don’t appreciate how preachy Luke is. . . he’s really a fuddy duddy. Like. . . everyone around Luke Cage is more interesting than Luke Cage. . . he’s a basically a black Superman, except he can’t fly.

BORING.

I like my superheroes with internal conflicts, and interesting perspectives, thank you very much.

And, by the way, “Lemonade was a popular drink and it still is”?
Wasn’t a hot line in the song. . . still not a hot line in the show.

Now, in all fairness to Luke Cage, I haven’t finished binge-watching the season, and I heard the show gets better. . . I gotta say, I’m not optimistic. . . and, y’all know how I feel about shows. . . there’s too much good TV to for me to spend time watching shows I don’t even like.

I would cut Luke Cage off after three episodes like I do network shows. BUT, since it’s a Netflix show, and I have the day off from work. . . I’ll watch it through to the end.

I am not expecting much, though.

Did you watch Luke Cage? Do you have a billion questions like I do?
Hit me up in the comments on goodmorningblacktwitter.com or @ me, @gmbtshow.
And, remember, whether you’re watching or listening to the show, subscribe and rate it. I’d appreciate it.

Let’s argue about things that don’t matter! Have a good morning, Black Twitter.

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